Keep Coming Back To Your Why

Dave: 0:02

I think you find yourself at square one every day if you look at it in the right way every day is a new chance to grow and learn and discover something different and take new chances and new risks.

Jess: 0:16

So here we are, another Square One Show podcast after

Dave: 0:21

ish

Jess: 0:21

705 days.

Dave: 0:24

It's like two years.

Jess: 0:25

That's been a long time. Dave and I were talking the, maybe it was just more me talking the last few days. I'm like, you know what? We should just really We have so many conversations on the couch that we're like, we should record this and share this.

Dave: 0:44

Yeah. So we'll see if that was a good idea or not. Yeah, yeah,

Jess: 0:53

have already talked about and making it real and authentic again. That's, that's, I think that's been our biggest challenge, right? We didn't want to be in the studio and have this like professional show thing. Like we wanted these real conversations around starting a business and we each own our own businesses. And so the podcast has just taken a. Way back seat to businesses and our kids and our life.

Dave: 1:21

and I think it's I think we got tired of getting sucked into the whole, not that we were ever trying to compete with other podcasts or trying to achieve something like lots of listeners and all that, but I think that could play into it a little bit. I think we want it to be more just we talk and have meaningful conversations and meet interesting people and talk to them and if people want to listen, that's great. If they don't, then that's okay too. Like it's not something that we're trying to do to replace. income or make it our career. It's just something we want to do to, because we enjoy it and hopefully other people do too.

Jess: 2:01

Yeah, absolutely. I feel like we, when we started podcasting, it was, it was just showing up and talking and having conversations. And then all of a sudden it was like, well, how do I do this so I can get more advertisers?

Dave: 2:15

Yeah, I

Jess: 2:15

pay us money to be on the show.

Dave: 2:17

yeah, and everybody had a podcast and it's, which is not a bad thing. I think a lot, everybody should have a podcast or start a podcast. But once you start having a podcast, you start thinking, well, maybe Well, theirs is better than ours, or we should be better, right? Why don't we have more listeners? And you get caught up, and it's the whole thing, same as social media and all that stuff, where you can get sucked into the things that aren't important. So I think we're trying to get back to, well, why did we do this in the first place? And What is the real meaning behind it? And just not care about all the other, like stupid, shallow peripheral stuff. Just do it because it's something that we enjoy. And if other people like it, that's great. If not, that's okay too.

Jess: 3:02

I think I've been really frustrated the last, even just the last couple weeks and couple months with trying to keep up with an algorithm. Like, you take these courses and you're trying to figure out, oh, well if I'm going to be on this platform, I need to figure out how this works. And then I need to post the way they say to post. But then I have to post at the right time and then I have to post at the same, the same exact time every day, so I can interact with the same people every day, so that the algorithm will say, All right, she's, she's showing up, and she's getting an audience, and now we can monetize that stream, and we can have a better idea of who she's talking to. I'm just so sick of it.

Dave: 3:43

See again, that's math, and we already established we're not good at math, so. We just need to give up on algorithms.

Jess: 3:51

We're giving up on algorithms and math altogether.

Dave: 3:54

Which, obviously, that's not true. Algorithms are very important and useful.

Jess: 3:58

Yes, they are.

Dave: 4:00

I don't need to worry about it. I'm not the one programming the algorithms, or,

Jess: 4:04

No. You also don't care about social media. You've never, you really have never cared about it.

Dave: 4:13

Well, I'm not, we both are, but we're in that Gen X generation that we obviously didn't grow up with social media and something that,

Jess: 4:22

Lord we didn't grow up with social media.

Dave: 4:24

it's something we adopted when it came out, but it's never been something that, I mean, I follow it and we'll check on friends and family that are. I mean, we have a lot of friends and a lot of family that live all over the world, really. And so that's one of the few ways to keep in touch with a lot of them in an easy way. But other than that, I don't really engage too much on it. I think I have like one or two posts a year, possibly. And

Jess: 4:50

I think most of your social media presence is me tagging you.

Dave: 4:54

Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, if you didn't tag me, I wouldn't be online at all. Like one of our

Jess: 4:58

David Lewis existed.

Dave: 5:00

Yeah, one of our friends said that my likes on Facebook pages are like little like flakes of gold or something. Because I never like anything. Yeah.

Jess: 5:11

know it's good if you posted and Dave Lewis liked it.

Dave: 5:14

Which is really not true either. It just means I just happened to see and decided to like it that day. Yeah, I don't know. I just, I've never seen the value completely in it. I mean, I know there is value and people use it for good, but it's also annoying too, and I just never really wanted to get caught up and be in it

Jess: 5:38

Right.

Dave: 5:39

I guess.

Jess: 5:40

And I think that's the fun thing about podcasting is I guess to market your podcast, you use social media. But if we just want to show up and have conversations and talk with people, I don't know, I think I'm ready for it again. And, you know, a lot of what we started this square one show was because we kept finding ourselves starting over on different things. And I thought, Oh, right, we're going to start the square one show, and then it's going to be a thing and it's going to grow. And we're never gonna find ourselves back at square one again.

Dave: 6:14

I think,

Jess: 6:15

Here we are.

Dave: 6:16

I think you find yourself at square one every day if you look at it in the right way every day is a new chance to grow and learn and discover something different and take new chances and new risks. I mean, even like our businesses that we've had for several years now each, like there's always still new things and new opportunities and new chances to jump into something that looks really scary and take a big risk. Has potentially more reward and wrestle with those decisions if it's a good idea or not. And then ultimately just choose one or the other and hope for the best. So I don't think we should ever be in a stale, stagnant place.

Jess: 7:06

Yeah. And if we, if we do find ourselves in a stale, stagnant place, what's the best step forward?

Dave: 7:16

Go outside and take a walk or I don't know. There's lots of,

Jess: 7:20

Yeah, that works for

Dave: 7:21

to talk to people.

Jess: 7:22

not being online.

Dave: 7:24

I think just get out of your set. Yeah. I was going to say, I think I feel like one of the most. One of the times I feel most stale and stagnant is when I'm sitting on my butt scrolling through social media. It feels like completely unproductive and soul sucking. And so, just getting off your phone and going and doing anything else, going to the library and getting a new book, or, I don't know, watch a documentary instead of reality TV for a night and learn something different.

Jess: 7:52

Yeah.

Dave: 7:54

But, yeah,

Jess: 7:55

our brains are wired for that,

Dave: 7:57

Well, yeah, I mean people have gotten really good at knowing how to market to us and capture our brains and our Our minds for as long as possible to distract or to put the attention where they want it instead of where it's more useful for us or more beneficial.

Jess: 8:15

Right. So I think intentionality is really Maybe the start of square one is being intentional with your time. Like, if you're starting every day from square one and starting with an intention,

Dave: 8:29

Yeah, for sure. I mean, it's intention and it's perspective. It's how you look at it. I mean, you could wake up every day and be like, Oh, gosh, I got another friggin day. I got to go do whatever I got to do that. I hate. Yeah. Eight hours at this job. I hate and or you could wake up and say, Hey, I got another chance to. change and grow and help my neighbor or whatever, like just how you look at it. And then we're all guilty of doing both, but I think the more that we can choose a positive perspective and attitude and force yourself to grow and challenge yourself and that's that's, yeah,

Jess: 9:14

I think that's a lot of things, too, that you and I have been talking about, like, on the couch. I've been trying to figure out, like, if I started a newsletter, like, what would this newsletter be? What would I talk about? I do voiceover for work, but I really don't like the idea of having a newsletter about talking about microphones or the right interface to you. I don't know. It's just, it seems very technical and not interesting to me. And I thought, you know, I could get into this idea of self leadership. And Dave's like, you're like, it's not about self leadership.

Dave: 9:48

yeah.

Jess: 9:49

It's, it's more about human flourishing.

Dave: 9:53

I think what I, I think what I first said is I, I hate. The term self leadership, I guess. I don't know. It just,

Jess: 10:01

what you said. I was like, I don't know. I'm trying to figure out, you know, how do I show up and how do I help people? Do I need to help people? Is somebody else helping people?

Dave: 10:09

Yeah.

Jess: 10:10

do I have to help people? Like, I want to, but I just don't know how.

Dave: 10:14

yeah. I just the self leadership just, it harkens back too much for me to the self help movement, which I hate. I think it's Detrimental. I, I'm not against the idea of growing and learning

Jess: 10:28

Personal growth is

Dave: 10:29

bettering yourself, but the self help is so inward focus, which I think most of our culture and society is all inward focus and how do I, how do I make myself better for me so that I can succeed and I can grow and, and you lose that perspective again of, well, what's the point of it all really, if it's just a, you know, Make yourself grow and get better than how is that really making any kind of positive impact on the rest of the world and we find that a lot of people that are pursuing those paths, they still end up depressed and anxious and unfulfilled. So to me, it's more ultimately about. Well, how are we contributing to society as a whole? How are we growing our culture in a positive way? How are we growing our neighborhoods and our communities? And obviously being a, a better person yourself is, is a part of that, but if all we're doing is focusing on how to make ourselves better than, We're kind of losing sight of that ultimate goal. And we're becoming more self centered, I think, which is not a good place to be. It's not a positive place

Jess: 11:43

well, that's where our culture is. It's very self centered, and it's really easy to market to someone who's very self centered.

Dave: 11:49

that's what most of our marketing is. I mean, even something as stupid as Burger King, BK, have it your way. It's all about you and whatever you want or need. So,

Jess: 11:59

choices, your,

Dave: 12:01

yeah.

Jess: 12:01

yeah,

Dave: 12:03

So I think. Taking the spotlight spotlight off of ourselves and our personal ambitions and desires and and more focusing outward And seeing opportunities where we can serve or where we can invest our time and our energy and our our talents That's where we see real growth. It's not Just by reading a bunch of self help books or going to conferences like and those things aren't bad those things are good

Jess: 12:35

those are good.

Dave: 12:36

to learn but if that's all you're doing is going to all these courses and reading all these books and Reading all these Instagram pages or whatever to figure out how to be the superhuman that you're still gonna Miss the point I think so

Jess: 12:52

And the point is,

Dave: 12:54

the point is To, to use what God has given us to help human flourishing in general and to, to grow, to bring everybody to, to a better place. Not just ourselves.

Jess: 13:09

I think it's, it's important to point out, too, that growth doesn't always mean, like, actually seeing it grow. Because when you have a seed, you put it in the ground, right? And you don't see any kind of growth for a long time. But you know, it needs to have that germination period of that.

Dave: 13:26

Yeah.

Jess: 13:27

the constant water

Dave: 13:29

Yeah. And

Jess: 13:29

and sunlight.

Dave: 13:31

and it's not an easy process either. There's lots of struggle and pain and those are the parts that we often want to skip in our, in Growth we don't want and again going back to our culture because our society tells you you can have have it your way and Most people's way is not does not involve pain or discomfort So that's when we try to avoid that and avoid those things. We're again missing the bigger picture and I'm missing out on What, what could actually be a better, better end.

Jess: 14:07

Yeah, no, I love that. I think those are the kind of conversations that we want to be having here and just sharing those conversations. Because I feel like there's a lot of people who would relate to this,

Dave: 14:20

Oh, I think so. I think.

Jess: 14:21

getting it a lot of places.

Dave: 14:22

Yeah. And, and I feel bad and I think, again, we all get sucked into different things sometimes and it sounds great and I go, yeah, of course we should be. Growing and making ourselves better and like going to these conferences and it sounds amazing. And I think especially a lot of younger people or they get into these like gurus that tell them how to 10x their. Success and how to make it better and which is, which is, there's always a little bit of truth in those things, but again, if it's all focused on themselves and their personal success and that kind of stuff, then it's really kind of ultimately meaningless in the end. So I

Jess: 15:03

Yeah. So really, our intention is to be doing things with purpose, with meaning behind what we do and not being self serving. Yeah.

Dave: 15:13

Right.

Jess: 15:15

Trying to push for human flourishing and help, help those of us who are maybe in a family, starting up a business, trying to figure out how to manage life in general with

Dave: 15:29

Yeah. Yeah.

Jess: 15:32

all the things.

Dave: 15:33

Yeah. And again, like I was saying about avoiding pain and suffering and all that stuff, like obviously you don't want pain and suffering, but like work itself, I think a lot of times in our culture is looked at as a bad thing and an evil thing and something to be avoided. Like how can we, make something that allows us to not have to work. We can retire when we're whatever, 50, which. I think that's not a good view. I think work itself is not bad. A lot of times, actually, work itself is what Gives us purpose and gives us a reason to wake up and a reason to to try harder to grow and to, to build things. And so I just, I guess would caution not to always be thinking that we have to avoid work. We have to avoid things that are hard. I see a lot of people doing a whole lot of work to try and avoid working, which is. Ironic, but I

Jess: 16:29

feel like I fall into that. I feel like you watch me do that on a daily basis.

Dave: 16:33

yeah, but I think instead of trying to avoid work, maybe spend some more time and energy in finding the work that you're really good at and the work that you find your purpose in and not you. Can invest your, your energy and your time and, and and really see the difference when you're doing it. So

Jess: 16:53

Yeah, no, I love it. These are the conversations that we have all the time and we just, we want to be recording this and sharing this with, sharing this with friends, future friends,

Dave: 17:05

yeah. And then we,

Jess: 17:06

around this idea of purposeful work

Dave: 17:10

yeah. And if we do still want to be talking to other people too, and not

Jess: 17:15

and getting their

Dave: 17:16

but yeah, engaging with them and hearing like how they've found purpose in their work or how they And even like, and we're not shying away from like how they got to where they are and that kind of stuff, which is how we started the square one show. I think it's still part of part of the show. It's but there might be episodes like this where it's just, just my talking and hopefully not rambling on too much, but

Jess: 17:40

Working out our ideas. And

Dave: 17:42

yeah. And again, we're not, we're not experts. We don't know more than others other than our personal experiences and what we've Done through our businesses and our work and our personal education and, and those things. So

Jess: 18:00

I feel like we've started from square one a thousand times, so we can definitely talk on the humility part of all this.

Dave: 18:07

So I think you get your money's worth when you listen to the show, but

Jess: 18:10

I think so too.

Dave: 18:13

it's full free.

Jess: 18:14

All right. Well, the kids are going to get off the bus in about three minutes, and Truett's going to come running up the driveway with his little backpack, and it's going to get really loud.

Dave: 18:23

the tornado is coming.

Jess: 18:25

tornado is coming.

Dave: 18:26

Yeah.

Jess: 18:27

So with that said, we're going to wrap this show

Dave: 18:30

a nap right now and she has no idea what's about to hit.

Jess: 18:32

Our cat,

Dave: 18:33

yeah,

Jess: 18:34

our cat Popsicle,

Dave: 18:35

to get a, a rude awakening, literally, so,

Jess: 18:39

does every day at 3. 30.

Dave: 18:41

yep,

Jess: 18:42

So, all right, well, thank you guys for listening and we'll get some more shows out there for you. If you have any questions, please reach out. It's either Jessica or Dave, jessicaatsquareoneshow. com. You can reach us there or visit squareoneshow. com. I'll take you to our page with all the other podcasts you can check out. All right, until next time.